Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
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