worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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