I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize