hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
he just fucked me for my cheese.
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