Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize