saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize