you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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