I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
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the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
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I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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