Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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