I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
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Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
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you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize