I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
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