Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
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