He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize