It's a beautiful day for a hangover
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
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we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
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