Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Randomize