my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
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