just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Girls should come with a carfax report
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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