I'm eating all of the evidence.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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