So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
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My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
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Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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