what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize