He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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