It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
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Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
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I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
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