how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Randomize