Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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