i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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