the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize