i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
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