corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize