She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize