i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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