what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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