It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize