Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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