there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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