I wannas sexs uuuuu
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Randomize