yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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