Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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