I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
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