check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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