Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize