I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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