There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my gift to your gina
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize