Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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