Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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