absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
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