p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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