No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
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