I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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