My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
You need Xanax blowdarts
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Randomize