so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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